Any time we decide to try something new, or make a change in our lives, we are being a little bit vulnerable. We don’t know if we’ll be able to do it, do it well, enjoy it and see growth from it. This could be, for example, joining a bible study, going back to Church in person, starting a new exercise program, taking a class, starting a hobby or meeting a new friend for coffee.
Vulnerability is an interesting topic from a spiritual perspective. A key to spiritual growth is being vulnerable with God and with others. It’s odd to think that we might try to hide our weaknesses and foibles from ourselves, the all-knowing God, and from the people we are closest to, but as I stand in the confession line, I think, boy I wish I didn’t have to talk to God about this. Being vulnerable opens us up to forgiveness, healing and growth, but it takes humility and courage — and it can feel risky and frightening. We may wonder if people will think less of us or maybe they won’t like us if they know the ‘real’ us.
The Pharisees are an example of pride, rather than vulnerability. They were concerned about appearances, acted like they were perfect and pointed their fingers at others. They hid their true selves and were not vulnerable or humble enough to work on the ‘inside of the cup.’ They would, in the words of Jesus, “strain at a gnat and swallow a camel.”
St. Paul, on the other hand, is an example of vulnerability. He accepted the difficulties, rebukes and hardships he endured in evangelizing as he traveled with other disciples teaching and preaching — seeking to please God, not man. Since he had persecuted Christians before his profound conversion, something he never forgot, he openly and authentically shared that he had been saved by Jesus, that Jesus was everything, not him. He was open about his weaknesses and mistakes and his vulnerabilities drew people to him in a powerful way.
It is interesting to look at our own lives. Sometimes our nature might be to be more quiet and hidden. I consider myself reserved and prone to self-reliance. To be vulnerable is something I’m growing in as I seek to share more about my personal and spiritual struggles in my writing, speaking and ministries — and even in simple coffee talks with close friends.
As I open up more, there is freedom and joy in the authentic exchange that ensues as it builds deeper and truer bonds of love between friends and between me and God.
If we don’t have vulnerability, we don’t have true friendship do we? It’s a deep topic that I can’t do justice to in this short article, but I’ll close with this thought. We are often invited to share in the vulnerability of others. Are we open, loving, kind and receptive when others share their weaknesses and struggles with us? Can we be trusted to love them through it — and do we have a strong reliance on a prayer and sacramental life so that God’s grace can work through us to be charitable with Christ-like love and honesty?
Lord, help us to see the goodness in vulnerability, give us the courage to practice it, and by your grace may we be charitable and sensitive to those who are vulnerable with us, Amen.